i touched a dick once and it was the scariest thing in my life because it had a really cold head and i don’t know it wasn’t fun
sometimes the ‘i’ and ‘u’ shouldn’t be so close on the keyboard
ive seen this post umpteen times and ive always thought that if you switched u and i around it wouldn’t make sense like “u touched a” and i literally just realised you meant duck and not dick i swear to god i am the biggest fucking idiot.
I really hate when I put food in the microwave and it starts popping and making explosive noises so I check it and it’s freezing cold like why you gotta play me like that
Let’s play a fun game called “we’re just friends but I’d fuck you if you asked”
i wonder how many ponytails i can put in my hair
i can put 25 ponytails in my hair